You're the best, Remus
by Weird Not Boring
Summary: All dialogue between Remus and Lily. James Lily in the end. "Oh wait! I have a point! I promise! . . . The point was that you're the only guy who I have to talk about things with, so I was wondering . . ."
1. Where Harry gets his CAPSLOCKyness from

**D**rat! **I S**eclude **C**ompletely all **L**iterature and **A**dmit all **I**ngenious **M**onomaniato **E**ntertaining **R**owling. (A.k.a. I don't anything, it's all J.K. Rowling's!)

_**A/n:** Hello Everyone. Yes, I'm back! Yay! And it isn't a one-shot this time. No, I have finally written another multi-chaptered fic, and I am immensely pleased of it. The chapters will be somewhat short, and there will only be about 6 of them, but I love it none-the-less. It's going to be an all-dialogue, so if you don't like that, you can turn around right now and I wouldn't take offense. All chapters are between Remus and Lily. _

_One last thing: the " . . ." or " . . . bla bla" are silence. The character isn't saying "dot dot dot"._

_Happy Holidays!_

**_

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_**

"Remus?"

"Mm?"

"Do you think I'm pretty?"

"What? Of course I do."

"You're just saying that."

"No I'm not. Merlin, Lily! Everyone thinks you're pretty."

"That's because everyone is really nice."

"Lily, you asked me a question and I answered."

"Untruthfully."

"I promise you, Lily, I didn't lie to you."

"Well, if everyone thinks I'm pretty, how come I don't have a boyfriend?"

" . . . Well, I hate to be the one to tell you this, Lily, but all the guys are afraid of you."

"Afraid!"

"Yes, well, you come off rather . . . ."

"Smart?"

"No, not only that, but . . . what's the word I'm looking for . . . "

"Strong?"

"Scary."

" . . . Oh."

"Plus, James threatened to kill anyone that even looked your way in a more-than platonic way."

"WHAT!"

"Oh, wait now, Lily . . ."

"I AM GOING TO KILL HIM!"

" . . . he told me not to tell you . . ."

"POTTER IS DEAD!"

" . . . and I promised I wouldn't . . ."

"I CAN'T _BELIEVE _HIM"

" . . . and if he knew I told, he'd . . ."

"WHAT AN ARROGANT PRAT!"

" . . . kill me too, and I really don't feel like . . . "

"JUST BECAUSE I WON'T GO OUT WITH HIM!"

" . . . dying today, because I have a DADA assignment due tomorrow that I worked really hard on and . . ."

"WHO DOES HE THINK HE IS!"

" . . . I really want to know what score I got and . . ."

"I AM GOING TO BLOODY TEAR HIM FROM LIMB TO LIMB!"

" . . . LILY WILL YOU SHUT UP FOR ONE SECOND AND LISTEN TO ME!"

" . . . Oh my gosh. . . . I never thought I'd actually hear Remus raise his voice!"

"Lily . . .?"

"Hee Hee Hee . . ."

"Lily . . . It's not that funny. . . ."

"Hee HEE!"

"Lily, seriously. You can stop laughing now . . ."

"HA HA! That's _hilarious!_ HEE HEE HEE!"

" . . . Okay, yes Lily, I get it. It was funny. . . . "

"HA HA HA!"

"Don't make me yell again."

"Ha h-"

"Much better. Now, Lily, you can't kill James."

"Why not?"

"That would be murder, Lily."

" . . . Oh. . . . Darn!"

"And, you're not supposed to know."

"Know that he threatened to kill all the guys that ever dared to look at me!"

"Yes, well . . . no. It sounds so much worse when you say it."

"Well if he didn't want me to know, he shouldn't have done it in the first place so I wouldn't have found out!"

" . . . Your logic is very confusing."

"So that's why Davey Gudgeon ran away when I asked him if he needed help on his Charms homework . . ."

" . . . So you promise not to tell James?"

" . . . I guess so. But don't blame me if you find that tomorrow he is sprouting purple hair . . ."

"I'll pretend I didn't hear that."

"You're the best, Remus."

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_**A/n:** So? Like it so far? I'm going to try to reply to all Reviews with the spiffy new review reply thingy, so leave plenty! _

_:coughcough: A Fork In An Eye by the Round Robin Ducklings :cough: (The next chapter's mine! YAY!)_

Review and I'll love you forever. :smileyface:


	2. The only way to shut Lily up

_**D**rat! **I ****S**eclude **C**ompletely all **L**iterature and **A**dmit all **I**ngenious **M**onomania to the** E**ntertaining **R**owling. (A.k.a. I don't anything, it's all J.K. Rowling's!)_

_**A/N: hey! Okay, this wasn't the original 2nd chapter I had written . . . but something bugged me about that one and so I completely rewrote it and added something in. Kudos if you can figure out what it is! But I'm pretty happy with this version, even if it is somewhat short.**_

**_Oh! I haven't found a good spot to have them tell you guys what the setting is, except for in the next chapter. So you'll just have to wait and see!_**

**_#3: Stupi- erm, lovable has now stopped letting me do the " . . ." here. They don't show up by themselves. so, I have just made many many dots before Remus or Lily say something. If anyone finds them annoying or unnessary, tell me, and they won't appear in any other chapters. _**

**_This chapter is dedicated to all Remus/Lily shippers._**

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"Remus, I think I'm going to book a room in Azkaban." 

"What's the matter?"

"It was Potter again! He's so . . . annoying! He just makes me want to take my wand and . . . BAM! No more Potter."

"What happened? Did he ask you out again?"

"Yes, but he always does that. I'm quite used to it."

"That's true."

"Ugh! He's so stupid! I hate him! Why does he have to do that!"

"Do what? What did he do?"

"He totally embarrassed me in front of the whole school, that's what he did!"

"Yes, but what did he do!"

"He called me a Teacher's Pet! Right in front of everyone!"

"You mean that's all he did? No hair or body changes? He didn't transfigure you into a muskrat?"

"No, but this was way worse! He's such a little twat!"

"It's okay, Lily, it wasn't that big of a deal . . ."

"NOT THAT BIG OF A DEAL! HE UNDERMINED MY AUTHORITY AND-"

"Wait, Lily-"

"I'M HEAD GIRL! HE CAN'T JUST GO AROUND TREATING ME LIKE-"

"Oh no, not again."

"HE'S BETTER THAN ME! JUST BECAUSE HE KNOWS PEOPLE IN HIGH-"

"Okay, Lily, calm down."

"PLACES AND CONVINCED ONE OF THEM TO MAKE HIM HEAD BOY-"

"Lily, please."

"DOESN'T MEAN . . . MMPHHHHH!"

" . . . . . . .You just kissed me."

"Right. . . . Now, Lily. MMPHHH!"

" . . . . . . .And you just kissed me back."

"Of course I did. Now shut up and let me do it again."

" . . . Oh Merlin, James is going to kill me."

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**_A/N: And please don't kill me! I promise it shall be Lily/James in the end. But this is always how I pictured it . . . It's so Remus-esque. I swear, I'm in love with Remus. I truly am._**

**_All reviews will be replied to. . . . Unless I forget. Then you can yell at me. Which is always fun. :)_**


	3. You're sorry?

_A/N: Okay, yes, I know it's uber uberly short . . . and it took a long time to post . . . But you love me anyway, right? Of course you do!_

_Disclaimer: HA HA HA! You want to sue me? HA HA HA! Okay, erm, characters/setting (which is finally revealed! YAY!) are not mine._

* * *

"Hey" 

"Hey"

"Erm . . ."

"Well, I better be going."

"Wait, Lily! I'm sorry."

"You're sorry for kissing me?"

"Well, no. It was bloody good."

"Thanks . . . I thought so too."

"Lily. . . . are you blushing?"

"NO! Just . . . just go on. What are you sorry about?"

"I'm sorry going behind James' back."

"But!"

"I don't think we should continue."

"Continue! You make it sound like all of our meetings here in the Astronomy tower have been snog-fests!"

"Well, one out of two! That's not very good odds!"

"But I-"

"And this guilt, Lily! I can't even look at James, I feel so awful!"

"Why? We-"

"Honestly, Lily, James would be heartbroken."

"WELL I DON'T GIVE A DAMN ABOUT JAMES! I FANCY _YOU_!"

" . . . Oh."

" . . . Oh my Merlin."

"Wait! Lily! Come back!"

"What have I done . . . ?"

"LILY! . . . . . . James is really going to kill me."

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_A/N: Okay, so you see that Lily's very confused, and somewhat not-Lilyish (see the fact that there is only one capslocky moment this whole chapter. Which is very out of character for Lily.)_

_And I'm very sorry for the lack of length, but, honestly, this whole conversation was incredibly awkward for them, so do you think they'd continue it on very long? I didn't think so. I promise next chapter will be long. I pinkie swear. _


	4. The one less traveled by

**Disclaimer: I read. I wrote. I disclaimed.**

_A/N: Is this early enough? I felt bad about the length of last time, but most of you were really nice about it! Thanks! I hope this makes up for it._

_The title is taken from one of my all-time favorite poems, The Road Not Taken, by Robert Frost. " . . . and that has made all the difference." I do not even pretend to own this poem. _

_P.S. **VISIT MY HOMEPAGE!**That said, I shall move onto:_

"Lily-"

"Goodbye."

"Wait, Lily! Stop!"

"Let me go!"

"I just wanted to talk to you."

"Give me back my wand!"

"I just want to talk."

"Well I don't."

"We have to, Lily! If we don't, our friendship will be blown to smithereens, everything will be awkward, and we'll never talk. I don't want that to happen, Lily, and I know you don't either."

" . . . Fine."

"If I let you go, do you promise not to run away?"

" . . . I promise."

"Okay."

" . . . Er, that was quite the hold you had on me."

"Well, you have been avoiding me for weeks, I didn't want to lose you again."

"Yeah, about that-"

"No, this is my turn to talk. Then you can."

"Fine."

"I don't want this to break up our friendship, Lily. I really like you; you're a great friend. But that's all we'll ever be. There's too many problems with us being more than platonic."

"No there's not!"

"Yes, Lily, yes there is."

"Oh really? Name three."

"Okay. 1. We're too alike. We'd get bored of each other after awhile. It'd be just the same old thing. Like that saying 'opposites attract'."

"Bu- . . . Fine. Two to go."

"2. James. . . . I think that's all I need to say."

"No, it's not! Why do you care so much about what he thinks! He's not in charge of me! It's my life! I can fancy who I want!"

"He's so much more than what you think of him, Lily, If you just gave him a chance-"

"He doesn't deserve a chance! What has he _ever_ done to deserve one?"

"You have no idea, Li-"

"So tell me!"

" . . . I can't."

"Why not?"

"It's not really my secret to tell. You'd have to ask him."

"All these secrets, Remus! Are they really necessary?"

"Yes! You have no idea, Lily, no idea."

"Don't you trust me? I figured out your erm . . . first secret, and I haven't told a soul! Doesn't that make me trustworthy?"

"And that's number three! My 'Furry Little Problem!' I could never endanger someone like that."

"You wouldn't endanger me! I-"

"It's a risk I'm unwilling to take, Lily, and that's final."

" . . . Remus . . ."

"I can't keep thinking about you in this way, Lily. It's driving me crazy! Can't we just be friends?"

" . . . . . . I don't know."

"I'm sorry."

" . . . I think I have some homework to finish."

"Wait, Lil-"

"We'll talk later, okay?"

"Okay. . . .Bye Lily."

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_A/N:_

_What:1 (one) BETA._

_Why:_

_1. I'm an American, my British is definitely not up to par. _

_2. to read my writing to make sure it makes sense or if there's any totally confusing/stupid/corny parts that should be removed A.S.A.P. _

_How: by E-mail (or AIM, if that works better. Send me an E-mail!)_

_When: As soon as possible! Time is of no matter, and there will definitely be times when I'm not writing._

_Where: Here, on and maybe a little post-age._

_Extra: a good sense of BritSpeak is mandatory. I need a BETA that is willing to speak their mind freely, and isn't afraid to say that something sucks, and sticks to their opinion. Credit will be given. _

All reviews will be replied to:)


	5. The mirror cracked from side to side

_A/N: Okay, yes, longer wait than usual. But it was only like two weeks, so I wouldn't be complaining if I were you!_

_Many many thanks to my new BETA **Myrtle Riddle. **She has been wonderful! Also, many thanks to all others who replied to my call for a new BETA. You guys rock!_

_P.S. **VISIT MY HOMEPAGE!** ((cough))_

* * *

"Hey."

"Hey."

"Oh, Remus!"

"OOF! ... Oh-uh. There, there Lily. It's okay. Er, you don't have to cry."

"Y-Yes I doooo! WAAH! I feel so h-h-horrible!"

"It's okay, Lily. You didn't do anything wrong."

"Y-yes I did! You and I ... never s-seeing each other ... I'M AN AWFUL PERSON!"

"No you're not, Lily. It hasn't been that long!"

"Y-Yes it has! 1 month, 2 weeks, 5 days, 6 hours and 23 minutes. Exactly!"

"Has it really been that long?"

"WAAAAAAAAAAAH!"

"I'll, er, take that as a yes."

" ... I feel so awful... "

"Shhh ... calm down. It'll be okay."

"And all b-because of one silly kiss... . "

"Well, I like to think that it was a bit more than that ... "

" ... I don't want to l-lose you."

"You won't. I'm right here."

" …Thank you."

" Here, have my hankie."

" ... You still carry a hankie?"

" ...Yes."

"Hee hee hee."

"Hey! That's not funny! Just because I was raised as a gentleman..."

"HA HA HA!"

" ... I guess laughing at me is better than crying."

" ... Thanks, Remus."

"It was no problem, Lily. Just don't do it again."

"Ha ha. Very funny."

"I know. I'm brilliant."

"Oh, really? Because the word I was searching for is 'lame'"

"Oh, it's on now."

" ... Hey, Remus! Stop! You know I'm ticklish there!"

"Exactly."

"REMUS! Hee hee ... this is not funny! Hee hee hee!"

"Actually, it really is quite amusing."

"Remus! Stop it!"

"What's the magic word?"

"_Stupify_? ... EEE! I'm just kidding! PLEASE!"

"Fine."

"Ah. Much better."

"You take the fun out of everything."

"I know. Friends again?"

"Of course. We always were friends."

"Oh, I missed you, Remus!"

"OOF! Lily! Can't breathe! Lack of Oxygen!"

"Oh, right. Sorry."

"It's fine."

" ... Er, I talked to Potter. He, er, told me."

"So I suppose it's he I can thank for your tears tonight?"

"Kinda, but not really. It was just me being fickle, I suppose."

"Lily, you are anything but."

"Thanks. Say, Remus, is that really true, I mean ... I kind of believed him, but I still want to have someone else's word."

"It's true."

"Wow. To think, Potter did all that. And Black and Pettigrew as well!"

"I told you, Lily, they aren't all that you think of them."

"Yeah, I guess so."

"I still think you should give him a chance."

"Maybe, not right now, though. I feel like I haven't talked to you in ages!"

" ... Do you want to get started on the Defense Against the Dark Arts essay?"

"You're the best, Remus."

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**_All Reviews will be replied to with many thanks._**


	6. Merely looking in all the wrong places

**Disclaimer: (ds-klmr) ****dis·claim·er** **NOUN** 1. A repudiation or denial of responsibility or connection.2. _Law_ A renunciation of one's right or claim.; Middle English, _denial of a feudal claim_, from Anglo-Norman desclaimer, _to disclaim, denial of a feudal claim_ ; see **disclaim **

**_I renounce my right or claim._**

_A/N: It's only been, like, what, a week? Yay! Go me! Okay, obviously, this story is almost over. There's only one or two chapters left. And, if I get enough positive comments for it, there will be bonus conversations of other characters (i.e. James and Lily) later. But only if I get positive reinforcement! So review people!_

_Much thanks to Myrtle Riddle for being the bestest BETA in the world and sending this back to me only hours later. You rock!_

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"I need help!"

"Woah! Slow down, Lily!"

"Can't. Must get to the kitchens."

"Must you drag me along too?"

"Of course! You're the one who's going to be helping me."

"Why do I get the feeling that I'm going to regret this?"

"Oh don't be silly. Why would you ever regret anything I ask you to do?"

"I don't know … Hmm … well there was that tim-"

"Never mind. Sit!"

"Oof!"

"Does sir or miss need anything?"

"Some tea would be nice."

"Yes, me too, please."

"Wel-"

"Okay, Lily, spill."

"Erm ... How are you, Remus? Life treating you okay?"

"That better not be what you dragged me all the way from Transfiguration to ask!"

"Erm, no. It wasn't."

"Well?"

" ... Well what?"

"What were you going to tell me!"

"Oh, well, remember how you told me to give Potter a chance?"

"Yes."

"Well, I have been and ..."

"And?"

"IthikIfacyim."

"Wot?"

"IthinkIfancyhim."

"Lily, I can't understand a word you're saying."

"I THINK I FANCY HIM, OKAY?"

"Finally!"

"It's awful, Remus! I don't know what to do! Suddenly, whenever I see him, my stomach churns, and I have problems breathing, or standing up straight, for that matter (thank goodness Alice was there) and I hate it! But I ... Merlin, Remus. Make it go away!"

"I'm not going to say I told you so."

"And he seems so much different now than he was before, and Merlin, I feel so stupid! How could I not have seen! I must be going blind! I mean, tutoring the first years, not participating in Sirius' stupid pranks, showing up early to all the prefect meetings,going to theSlug Club gatherings, doing the Head reports for me, always patrolling on time, and so much more that I never saw before. Or ... I did, but, I mean, I didn't, you know? It's like, when you see something, and then something happens ... and you see it in a different way, and ... well, I know I'm rambling, but I don't know what to do! Help me, Remus!"

"Calm down, Lily! Don't worry, I'm sure he likes you too, all you have to do is tell him ..."

"Tell him! No, I could never do that! Not after all that I've done to him. Merlin, how did he put up with it? After all that he's done, and what I did to him! I feel so awful! How could I have been so stupid!"

"You weren't being stupid, Lily, merely looking in the wrong places and seeing the wrong things. Does that make sense?"

"Yeah, actually, I suppose it does."

"Here is your tea, sir and miss."

"Thank you."

"Yes, thanks."

"You were just like ... like a bird picking out things to build its nest with. You looked at the wrong things, and your nest broke. And now all you need to do is look at the right things, and your nest will be complete again."

" ... So I should tell him?"

"I think you should."

"But how do I know that I truly fancy him? After all, it was only a couple months ago when I thought I fancied you."

"Well, after listening to all your "symptoms" these past couple of minutes, I'm pretty sure you do indeed fancy him."

"But doesn't that make me fickle?"

"Yes, but that's what we all love about you."

"I'm going to pretend you didn't say that."

"Whatever puffs your marshmallow."

"But what it he rejects me! After all the times I rejected him, how could he not?"

"He would be a fool if he did, Lily."

"Thank you ... wait. 'Puffs your marshmallow'!"

"Don't ask, it's a Sirius thing."

"Ah. Do you know where he is right now?"

"Sirius?"

"No! If I needed to find him, I would just need to look in the nearest broom closet. Where's Potter?

"Well ... it's right before dinner on a Tuesday night, so my guess would be on the Quidditch pitch, just ending practice. If you run, you can probably catch him just leaving."

"Thanks, Remus. Wish me luck!"

"You don't need it ... Oi! Don't forget to tell me what happens!"

"I won't. See you around?"

"Of course. Goodbye, Lily."

"Goodbye!"


	7. Lost and Found

Disclaimer: Leave me alone. No money is beig made from this, and I obviously don't own Harry Potter.

_To rainy days, _

_strawberry-flavored Popsicles,_

_robin-ly round ducklings, _

_and the annoying little voice in my head _

_that tells me when a chapter deserves to be shot._

"Remus! Oh Remus, I'm so happy!"

"Mm? Talked to James, have you?"

"Of course, you silly twat!"

"Well, according to Ebony Afton, there wasn't much talking going on, if you catch my drift."

"Well I'll be darned."

"Hmm?"

"I never thought she'd actually spread a truthful rumor."

"Well, there's more to it than I told you. She also told me that you were having his baby now, and he's going to resign from his position as Quidditch Captain, and give the title to you instead to prove his undying love for you."

"Ah, that makes much more sense. For a second there, I was worried about the apocalypse."

"I can see how that would worry you."

"Remus? Are you okay? You don't seem like yourself."

"Oh it's nothing, I just lost something earlier, I think."

"Oh? Where did you have it last?"

"The Astronomy tower. But I know it's not there."

"How do you know if you don't look, silly?"

"It was there too long. Somebody else found it."

"Did they give it back?"

"No. But at the time, I didn't think I wanted it back."

"But you do now?"

"I'm not sure. Maybe."

"Maybe you should go talk to the person that found it. I'm sure they'd give it back if they knew you wanted it."

"No, it's okay, thanks. I think it's in much better hands now."

"Oo-kay. If you think so."

"I do."

"Remus?"

"Mm?"

"We'll still keep talking, right?"

"Well, won't you be awfully busy? I imagine you and James are going to be spending a lot of time together."

"That doesn't mean I want to stop talking to you, Remus. Not at all."

"There won't be any time, Lily."

"We'll make time! I'm sure there's a way! Even if I have gag and tie up James to get it."

"Mm."

"Remus? Just because I'm going out with James doesn't mean I don't like talking to you."

"I know, Lily. And I'm glad."

"Well then, I'm glad too! And I suggest we get off this depressing subject before we kill ourselves."

"Good idea. What would you like to talk about?"

"Oh, I don't know. What would you like to talk about?"

"I asked first!"

"So? I asked second."

"Fine then. I would like to talk about-"

"Oh! I've been meaning to ask you for something."

"Mm?"

"Well, I know for certain that Alice and Frankfancy each other and ..."

"No way. No more matchmaker for me. I have hung up my sash, turned in my badge and resigned."

"Oh, please? They're perfect for each other!"

"No! Besides, aren't you supposed to meet James right about now?"

"Blast!"

"Goodbye, Lily."

"Don't think this means we're over, Remus J. Lupin! I could never forget about you!"

"Just as I could never forget about you."

"What did you say? You're mumbling again, Remus. I told you to stop that."

"Aren't you late?"

"Darn him! Who in their right mind volunteers to chaperone Hogsmeade!"

"James isn't in his right mind, Lily. You should know that. Now go, before Filch has your head."

"Aren't you going to Hogsmeade?"

"No, I think I'm just going to stay here, thanks. The castle is nice when everyone is gone."

"Everyone except the first and second years."

"They don't count. They're too small to be a bother."

"Was I a bother, Remus?"

"You could never ever be a bother, Lily. To anyone."

"Sometimes I worried-"

"You worry too much, Lily. Out of anyone in this castle, I think James has the most right to worry, anyway. His girlfriend is going to be murdered by Filch."

"Oh be quiet. I get the point. I'm going."

"G'bye, Lily."

"Goodbye Remus."

"Tell James I say Hello!"

"Of course. Goodbye!"

"Lily!"

"Yes?"

"You know the thing I thought I lost?"

"The one someone else has?"

"I think I must be going crazy, I just remembered I had it with me all along."

"Oh?"

"Yeah. It's safe and sound."

"Well I'm glad, Remus. But I really do have to go."

"Okay. Goodbye, Lily!"

"Goodbye, Remus."

"Wait, Lily!"

"Remus, Filch is going to eat my intestines if I'm late."

"I know, I just ... I just wanted to tell you that ... I think you're the best, as well, Lily."

"You're the best, Remus. You know that."

"One more time?"

"You're the best, Remus. Thanks for being such a good friend."

"You're a great friend, Lily, but you'd better go. Filch is going to eat your intestines if you're late."

"Oh, you! I'm going to have to talk to you later, prat."

"I 'm looking forward to it, Lily. Goodbye."

"Goodbye, Remus."

A/N: The end of the story, but not the end ofthe fic! I still have a couple bonus chapters of Lily/James talks for all those Lily/James fans out there. So, if everyone is good, and nice and reviews (like they did this chappie. Thanks! I don't deserve you!) I'll post them quicker.

This chapter hasn't been Beta-d, just a warning. So any mistakes are due to the fact that I wrote this at, like, 11pm and I don't have a Beta anymore.

I'm not even going to address the issue of how long this took me. If anyone really wants to hear my long rant, they can PM me. xD

All revews will be replied to!


	8. Bonus: Not completely stupid

Disclaimer: I wish.

A/N: So, the first of the bonus chapters. Right now, there is only one more, but some day there may be more, if wanted. It's Lily/James, yay! and (I don't think) as good as the other chapters. But I hope that the L/J fans will like it. It's a little The Phone Call-ish, and it's long, which is always good.

_To cell phones,_

_pointy sticks, friendship scars, _

_and all the lovely things that come with _

_Jamba Juice in the rain._

"Potter."

"Oh, hey Lily."

"Potter, I- I have something to ask you."

"Lily, I swear I didn't do anything!"

"No, that's not what I'm here for, I- Wait a minute, what did you do!"

"Nothing! So, Lily, what were you here for?"

"Oh no, you're not getting out of it this easy! What did you do?"

"I-"

"And don't change the subject!"

"I honestly didn't do anything, Lily. I swear on my love of all things Quidditch!"

"Fine, I believe you. But if anything is wrong-"

"Well, there might be a large sheet of clear-wrap spelled to be unbreakable draped tight from one side of the Charms corridor to the other."

"Might be?"

"Sirius had that devious look in his eye again."

"JAMES!"

"What?"

"YOU'RE HIS FRIEND!"

"So?"

"SO YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO CONTROL HIM!"

"Can anyone really control Sirius?"

"YES! ... Well, no. You're got a point."

"Not even Moony can!"

"Oh! Speaking of Remus! I had something to ask you."

"Mm?"

"Well, Remus and I, we've been talking a lot recently - don't look at me like that, James, you know it is nothing - and he told me that you weren't all that I thought you were and when I asked him why he said that he couldn't tell me why because it was a secret and to ask you. So I am. Asking you, that is."

"And Remus said this?"

"Mmhmm."

"Okay, come over here. We can't be overheard."

"Okay ..."

"_Silencio!_"

"So tell me!"

"Are you sure Remus said it was okay?"

"I'm sure."

"Okay. First of all, Remus is a were-"

"Well I know that he is a werewolf! What I don't see is how that concerns you!"

"You know?"

"Oh please, Potter, give me more credit than that. I figured it out years ago!"

"Oh. Really? And you didn't say anything?"

"No ... "

"Woah, cool."

"Please, Potter. What do you have to do with all of this?"

"Well, a couple years ago, we (that is, Sirius, Peter and I) figured out that Remus was a werewolf. We wanted to do something for him, but we didn't know what. We searched all over the library for a cure, but all we found was the fact that werewolves didn't harm other animals. Sirius made the stupid remark that he wished we were McGonagall - half human and half animal - and then it clicked, we could become animangi!"

"Potter, you don't mean ... "

"I'm a stag."

"Oh."

"Lily, that is completely unattractive."

"Oh."

"I think you can stop saying that word."

"So, you mean, you're really an -"

"Animangus? Yes. So are Sirius and Peter."

"But your names weren't on the animangus register."

"Well, we're not really lega-"

"YOU'RE ILLEGAL ANIMANGI!"

"Lily, shh!"

"POTTER, DO YOU KNOW HOW DANGEROUS THAT IS!"

"Yes, Lily, we just-"

"WERE RUDDY STUPID, THAT'S WHAT!"

"Lily, it's no big deal!"

"NO BIG DEAL! WE'RE TALKING ABOUT _YEARS_ IN AZKABAN! YOUR WHOLE SODDING LIFE, PROBABLY!"

"Well, it's too late now, isn't it?"

"WHAT WERE YOU THINKING!"

"We just didn't think we could do it, okay?"

"Oh."

"Yeah."

"I'm sorry."

"It's not your fault. I mean, we were just doing it as a joke. We didn't even tell Remus until I managed to first transform ... "

"That's amazing, Potter."

"Hm?"

"The fact that you would do that for someone. It's very admirable. ... Potter?"

"I'm sorry, Lily, I'm trying to not say anything stupid to ruin the fact that we're having a civil conversation right now."

"How about saying thank you?"

"Thanks, Lily."

"You're welcome. Er, I have to go."

"Wait, Lily! Don't go!"

"Yes, Potter?"

"Do you think you'd like to come to Quidditch practice tonight? I heard Ebony Afton talking about going. She's Sirius' snog-buddy right now, and I know you two are in the same dorm."

"We're not friends, if that's what you're implying. What time is it?"

"6:42."

"The practice?"

"No, right now. The practice is at 6:45."

"But Potter! That's in three minutes!"

"I know, I was hoping that you would allow me to accompany you there."

"Oh."

"I said something stupid, didn't I? Bugger! Remus said th-"

"Potter! You didn't say anything stupid, all right? Here. Deep breaths. In. Out. Feel better?"

"Yes, thanks Lily."

"Well, I finished McGonagall's essay early, so I guess I could go."

"Really!"

"Yeah. Now, am I going to have to walk all by myself, or are you going to come with me?"

"Lily, I would love to come with you."

"Then hurry up, slow poke. It wouldn't be right for the Captain to be late for his own practice, would it?"

"No. No it wouldn't."

"Good, so you're not completely stupid."

"You make me smarter, Lily."

"Please save the pick up lines, James. I'm not Ebony Afton."

"Right. No pick up lines. Got it."

"You know what?"

"What?"

"Maybe this won't be so bad after all."


	9. Bonus 2: Growing rumours

**Disclaimer: If I were JKR, do you really think I'd be writing fanfic?**

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* * *

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"What are they doing!"

"Shh! Do you want them to hear us?"

"What are they saying?"

"Shh!"

"Oh my Merlin."

"She just kissed him."

"More like snogged."

"I never thought I'd see the day."

"Maybe it's not really her."

"Of course it's her. No one has hair like that."

"Maybe it's not really him?"

"Oh no. I'd recognize him anywhere."

"Now what are they doing? Did she just kiss him again!

"No, I think this time it was he who kissed her."

"I would give anything to know what they were saying right now."

"Can't you read lips?"

"No."

"Ha."

"You can!"

"Of course! Can't you?"

"Didn't we just have this conversation? Oh my."

"Merlin! I can't believe she just said that."

"What! What did she say? What did he say?"

"She just asked him to Hogsmeade."

"She can't do that!"

"She's Lily Evans, she can do anything."

"But it goes against everything she's ever done!"

"This whole conversation has gone against everything she's ever done!"

"Good point. What are they doing now?"

"They're just kissing, nothing new."

"Wait! They stopped! What is he saying now?"

"He asked her to be his girlfriend. Well, more like demanded it. She agreed."

"Finally! He grows a spine!"

"More snogging. This is getting old. Wanna go spread a rumor about it?"

"You know me so well."

* * *

**_A/N: I know it's been forever, guys, and I know you all probably hate me because it's so short ... but I have good news! This is the end! YAY! I'd like to thank everyone for their wonderful support!_**

**_Many thanks,_**

**_Weird Not Boring_**


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